The Great Lie
Why are you hiding Beloved? I've been calling your name with hungry passion. I have been pressing my Spirit on those tender places in you so that you might draw near to me. Why won't you come? There's a place beneath the oak tree in the meadow that I wait for you to come and sit. The grass is full and soft, my shoulder ready to be leaned upon. The wind-blown wild flowers beckon you to come as they move and bend to the sound of my beating desire. It's constant. I smile as I think of who you are to Me, the joy you infuse into the world by simply existing. My heart leaps at the thought of your voice. Will you come and stay with Me awhile?
I stand at the end of the road looking out for your heavy-shouldered, world-wearied figure in the distance. My arms have never left their position of open embrace. The fulfillment of my flesh and blood await your parched-for-life soul. My eyes are fierce with the love of Heaven, waiting to see my son sitting at his rightful place beside Me at My festal table. My heart moves with deep compassion to see My crowned heiress dancing in her righteous robe as she did when she took that first breath of Life.
Why won't you come?
...
I had started down that dusty road home. I had felt Your Spirit pressing, Your beckon like wind's gentle brush against my skin. The hunger pains kept me up at night itching for a moment of Your Peace- the Peace that I have tasted at Your table.
But as I lifted my foot to step towards Your call, I heard a familiar thought echoing in my ears, "God is disappointed with you." It resonated so deep within me. It must be true. For what is true of everyone else around me? Whispered Disappointment. What is true of myself? Constant Disappointment. When I fail, forget, or freak out. Disappointment. When I haven't come around in awhile. Disappointment. When I take the glittering promises You've stored up for me and head as far away from You as I can get? Pig-Slop Disappointment and a heavy book-bag full of shame. It makes more sense than any vision of open embrace by a Perfect, Holy God. My rationing intellect must conclude that You are disappointed. How can I come like this?
Maybe with some time and space You'll forget or lessen Your frustration. Maybe if I give You Your place in the meadow and keep mine in this corner, You'll be pleased with me because my failure -my rebellion- will be farther away.
So great a lie could only come from the Great Liar himself- that what God wants from us is distance and space. The backwards-upside-down ridiculousness of this belief is that He came near to us in our rejecting to make a way for us to come near to Him in returning. Space is the very last thing a daddy wants from his baby boy or his precious little girl. So why do we believe this shame-inducing lie?
The truth is, God is not disappointed with you.
Yes, He is shamelessly in complete opposition towards our sin. He disciplines us through consequences and requires true repentance and a broken spirit over our rebellion. No doubt. It's His goodness that makes Him so. And it's also His goodness that never stops calling us home. His good, good, good heart never gives our seat away at His table. His passionately unchanging goodness waits for us in The Secret Place under that oak tree in the meadow.
We've all heard it, "God is disappointed with you." This smooth-speeched lie fits nicely with our man-made religion, so we are quick to believe it. The stealthy Accuser knows that if we can have this thought so ingrained in us that it becomes our instinct, our knee-jerk reaction when we fail, then we will think it must be God's conviction, and we will keep our distance out of "holy" fear. Somehow believing God needs space from us to appease Him or soothe His disappointment, we sadly reconfigure our Christian faith by believing that distance is more pleasing to Him, more humble and honorable, than coming near to God. Some go so far as to say it's arrogant to come near. Wonder where that hissing idea came from?
Arrogance is assuming God must feel about us the way we feel about ourselves.
And when we believe it, we miss out on days, weeks, even years at His table- His embrace. We miss out on the treasure trove of inheritance with our name on it, ready to be enjoyed in His Presence as He sees fit to release each promise into our lives. We miss out. And His heart grieves for it.
It's time now then. Time to say out loud, I reject the lie! Time to shake off the heaviness of shame and fear. Time to take off the weight of self-disappointment and set your feet toward home. Toward that grassy meadow.
The grass is as green as it gets under the oak where the wildflowers bend and blow.
"The fear of the Lord is hatred of evil. Pride and arrogance and the way of evil and perverted speech I hate." Proverbs 8:13
"You shall be holy, for I am holy." I Peter 1:16
"You, Lord, are forgiving and good, abounding in love to all who call to You." Psalm 86:15
"Give thanks to the God of Heaven, for His steadfast love endures forever." Psalm 136:26
"The Lord God is in your midst, a Mighty One who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; He will quiet you by His love." Zephaniah 3:17